Safety Plans

If you are in an abusive relationship, one of the most important steps you can take is to make a personal safety plan.

IF YOU ARE IN DANGER OR IN AN EMERGENCY PHONE 999

Domestic abuse is a crime. You will be taken seriously.

If you have made the decision to leave but are unsure of how to do this safely, the following may be helpful:

• Try to hide a small bag of essential documents such as bank account information, birth certificates, passport etc. either in your home or at a friend’s house.

• Plan an escape route.

• If you or your children take regular medicine, try to keep a small amount hidden; talk to your GP about this if you can.

• If you do not already have a mobile phone, try to get one.

• Let someone you trust know what you are planning. Consider telling the Police so that they are aware of your intention – they may be able to help you leave safely if you think your partner won’t let you get out of the house.

• If you have a car and plan on taking it, make sure that it is in your name only or it may be used to track you.

• Try to establish a routine each day when you are out of the house alone.

• If you have children and they are in school, think about whether or not you will send them to school on the day you leave.

• Remember to pack favourite toys, nightwear, toiletries etc. Most refuges can offer essentials but it may make it easier for you to feel comfortable if you have some of your own things with you. If possible, keep a bag packed and hidden in your home or a friend or relative’s house.

• Try to keep a small amount of money so that you can get a taxi or bus if you need it. If you have a joint bank account, open an account in your own name.

• KNOW WHERE YOU ARE GOING.

If you are living alone:

If you do not live with your abuser or have left and established your own home:

• Change the locks on doors and windows.

• Ask the Police for information about alarms and help with getting additional locks fitted.

• Teach children who to call in an emergency.

• Talk to the school about who has permission to pick up the children.

• Get information about your legal rights.

• Know where you can go if you have to leave suddenly.

What to do at work:

Ask your employer if they have a domestic abuse policy for their staff. Although it can be difficult to talk about at work, your employer and colleagues can help keep you safe at work and are more likely to be able to support you if they know what is happening.

• You may want to let someone you trust know what is happening. Talk to the personnel department and ask about the Domestic Abuse Policy and emergency leaving procedures.

• If you are likely to be threatened at work, let your colleagues know who to look out for and arrange to be away from front line duties if possible. Provide a picture of the perpetrator if possible.

• Ask to park close to the building if possible and if there is a security guard, ask them to escort you to the building if necessary.

• If you receive e-mails, phone calls or texts, make a note of them and the names of any witnesses.

• If necessary and appropriate, ask to be given alternative duties so that you are not answering the phone or opening the door.

• Identify an emergency contact and let your employer know who they should call if they cannot locate you.

• If there are any legal orders in place such as a non molestation order, give a copy of this to your employer.

• Ask about alternative hours or work location either as a temporary or permanent arrangement.

If you decide to stay:

If you do not want to leave, it is important that you know where you can access help if the situation changes and know how to keep yourself safe.

• Know the number of someone you can call in a crisis.

• If possible, arrange for a neighbour to contact the Police if they think you are in danger.

• Teach children who to call in an emergency.

• Plan an escape route for use in an emergency.

• Arrange a signal with a friend or relative that means you want them to get help.

Some of the questions you may be asked if you decide to report an incident of domestic abuse.

• Are you very frightened?

• Do you feel isolated from your friends and family?

• Do you feel that you are being stalked?

•Are you afraid that your partner or ex-partner will kill you or has your partner or ex-partner ever threatened to kill anybody?

• Have you ever been injured by your partner or ex-partner? Do you have any injuries as a result of the current incident? Are you afraid that you may be injured again?

• Does your partner or ex-partner behave in a jealous way? Do they try and control what you do?

• Does your partner or ex-partner have, or have they had a problem with alcohol, drugs or mental health issues?

• Do they have a criminal record for violence or drugs?

• Are you afraid that your children may be harmed? Do you argue over contact with the children?

• Are you pregnant or have you recently had a baby?